I Killed These Flowers For You Birthday Card

The irony of giving flowers with the best of intentions, only to watch them slowly perish on the shelf. This card speaks to that universal truth with deadpan humour and self-aware wit. Sardonic, sentimental, and brutally honest—it works for anniversaries, Valentine's Day, birthdays, congratulations, Mother's Day, or whenever you need to acknowledge that you tried. Perfect for partners, spouses, and anyone who'd rather laugh at life's small tragedies than pretend they didn't happen. Observational comedy at its finest.

First printed in 2020